February 28th, 2007
In the news yesterday, there was much hubbub about a fat boy in England whose mother was underthreat of child repossession by the state (she didn’t lose him after all). Officially the reason is “neglect,” which makes perfect sense to me, because clearly she is neglecting to feed the kid anything fresh and green, neglecting to take care of his health, neglecting to teach him about nutrition, neglecting to keep him healthy. She’s also neglecting to attend the pediatrician and nutritionist appointments the state has made for her in an effort to try and fix the situation before seizing takes place. It’s an interesting case because as far as I know, this is the first time a parent was under threat of losing their kid because they let him get fat (and we’re talking very fat, not just chubby). I don’t totally know what I think of this. I think taking a kid out of his home is a very serious thing, but as you all know I also think obesity is a very serious thing. If a parent resists reforming and continues to allow the child’s health to be severely compromised, what are we do to? It’s not okay to leave kids in abusive homes; neglect is abuse. In this case, the consequences for health, life and limb, are similar.
In the spirit of thinking about obesity, I have here reposted a rant from a month or two ago, about the BMI fuss in an American school. If you read it before, feel free to not bother reading it again. I’m reposting because I want it on this new blogsite, and because I liked it, dammit.
REPOST
Can we talk about fat?
Why have a BMI? It is associated with various weight related health disorders. People who fall into the overweight category on the chart, or higher, have a higher than normal associated risk for things like heart disease and diabetes. This is why you should care if you are overweight. I suspect, but cannot prove, that many people dismiss the BMI because it seems to hold us to an unreasonable standard – i.e., “no one is that thin!” My belief is that we think this way because obesity is so common that we’ve become used to it, and it seems normal. That makes it hard to believe that I, at five foot three, would be overweight at 140lbs. 140 isn’t so huge – or at least, isn’t so uncommon. But it is a health risk, no matter what I think about it.
Back to the kids. Does it hurt your self esteem to be told you are, according to the BMI, overweight? Possibly. But the reality is that everyone who will be thusly categorized will also, likely without exception, look fat. Little kids are not body builders. Being told you are overweight will not, I promise you, be news to these kids. Fat kids know they are fat. They can’t help it, they live in their bodies every second of every day. But even if they somehow totally fail to notice, their nasty little peers will delight in pointing it out. The BMI report isn’t what hurts. Being fat and teased for it, and/or ashamed of it, hurts. I guarantee this is already going on at that American school. I still remember the fat kid when I was in elementary school (his name was Jake). I was never a teaser, but plenty of others were, and this poor kid got it harsh for his weight. A note about his BMI wouldn’t have been news to Jake. It might have been a wakeup call to his parents.
The self esteem of children is very important. But here’s the thing: you can’t give it to someone. Telling a child he is wonderful doesn’t make him feel more confident. Confidence and esteem come from warranted recognition. So if little Johnny gets an improved mark, or produces some art, or behaves in an appropriate manner, or goes out of his way to help others, and he is recognized for it, self esteem can grow. Platitudes don’t work. Pretending there is nothing wrong with being fat in order to save a child’s feelings won’t work either, because children aren’t stupid and it’s plain as day that there is something wrong with being fat. Should there be? I say yes, because of the health risks. We’re not talking about conforming to sexist ideals or becoming anorexic, we’re talking about saving our joints, our hearts, and our longevity.
Fat, overweight, big boned, BMI above 24… it all means the same thing. But, you can lose weight. So I believe it is worth the potential risk to self esteem (assuming the child isn’t already aware and unhappy about their weight) in order to wake up some parents, get them to take responsibility for the lifelong health and emotional wellbeing of their kids, and change their eating habits. Saving some feelings at the cost of, say, diabetes, seems morally wrong, irresponsible, and insulting to the child. What kind of person would chose a high risk of chronic disease and an almost certainly shortened lifespan for their child, rather than face the reality?
I suspect the backlash against the BMI letter is fuelled largely by guilt. Parents know they are in large measure responsible for their children’s weights and health, and they’re fucking it up. Maybe they struggle with their weights too; many of us do. That’s no excuse for allowing your child to be put at risk. The BMI isn’t perfect but it’s pretty darn good, and any parent worth their salt would welcome a warning that could potentially allow them to alter their child’s life trajectory for the better.