July 20th, 2009
Nine days! Looks like no one I know is going to the Clutch show, so I’m free to sing along with gusto and without fear of reprisals. By which I mean witnesses whose opinion of me I might I care about.
In other news, I am trying a new way of losing weight. I had a good sit down with myself and determined I’m just not ready for another stab at starvation, even though I know it works. I’m usually not one for self deception but this might qualify, so I am presenting my idea to you, The Internet, for feedback. Should I be cheered on or do I need the sense slapped back into me? You decide.
The Plan:
1. Cut out junk food. Of all kinds except diet pop, which actually is a necessity for me, though I am going to cut back on it. I realized the other day I couldn’t remember the last time I had a glass of water and that was an alarming moment. Time to sub in some of the real stuff, methinks. Anyway, while home made sweets are permitted as an occasional treat (vegan safe!), candy and chips and related evils will be banished AS OF RIGHT NOW unless you tell me this whole plan is stupid in which case I will reevaluate.
2. Eat really healthy, good meals. Not huge meals, but appropriately sized nutrition bombs prepared with loving care by yours truly. The challenge here is portion control, which I hope to mainly achieve through a maximization of vegetable matter and a minimization of, well, high calorie stuff. My goal is to have satisfying but not stuffing meals.
3. Snacking permitted but only the good kind – an orange, a salad, that kind of thing. Small.
4. Get more exercise. This one is going to be a chore because as I keep telling you over and over, I am lazy as fuck. Husband works out with a trainer two hours a week and does a third hour on his own and he is in the best shape of his life, which is something considering he used to be a marathon runner and a military man. If he keeps this up he’ll end up like Bruce Lee, all small and wiry and unexpectedly fast. But me? I take a stroll most days of around 50 minutes duration, which generally involves me watching the dogs in the offleash park and sniffing roadside flowers and looking for kitties in the clouds. Not strenuous, is what I am trying to say. I have increased my walking but not by enough to actually do anything. So far no luck on the partnering front so I am going to have to just be disciplined and get off my ass and… and I haven’t gotten that far. God, I might have to go back to the gym. Ugh.
And that’s it. No starving, just an environment of mild deprivation and more exercise. I anticipate slow weight loss and occasional mad cravings for Old Dutch Rip-L-Chips, the finest chips known to man. It’s either incredibly sensible or incredibly delusional, and considering my desperation to avoid The Hunger I am not to be trusted in making the assessment. Thoughts?
Let’s see…stop eating junk food, exercise more…yeah, I don’t know where you get these ridiculous ideas. There’s no way that could work.
You don’t happen to rollerblade, do you? You live on one of my regular running routes, and while I get the impression that running isn’t your thing, I doubt you’d have any trouble keeping up if you had wheels. A bicycle would work too, but I doubt that’d give you much exercise unless you went a lot faster than I can run.