September 26th, 2009
I am back. I don’t imagine there are many of you left but I am away from home and that always makes me pensive, and then add being at the apartment alone plus the rye I had at dinner plus the song I posted last time I was here (Remember? Isn’t it a sad song?) and you get a blog post.
I am a creature of habit, more so than most people I think. When I hit on something I like I will stick with it for a long time. For example if I really love a song I can listen to it over and over for hours at a time. Or several hours at a time, every day for weeks in a row. I have been ordering the same sandwich at Subway two to four times a week for the last three years. I have certain books that I have been reading once or twice a year for over a decade. I only use one brand of toothpaste, the brand I’ve been using since childhood.
What I am saying is I like predictability and on the personality scale “openness to new experience” I score low. Travel is new experiences – travel upsets me greatly. Even though I am staying with a great friend and even though I am on a fantastic course, I really just wish I was home.
Strangely, I used to live here (I am on the east coast), but that doesn’t seem to be helping. In fact every time I see some familiar sight from my time here, I get a wave of loneliness that I just can’t explain. So I am finding it very painful to be here.
Still, despite it all, I am glad I came. I have had other experiences this week that have changed me for the better I think, and so it is not all gloom and doom.
Just some of it. Particularly at this moment.
At the risk of sounding corny, these experiences teach you about how much you value what you miss.
Unless you already knew that. And then they just suck.
Ha! My early morning laugh. A little of both actually.