Blogosaurus Vex

Have I told you I have the summer off?  I’m taking the summer off!  But I think I need a project so I don’t just get ass grafted to the couch with stacks of books and the carcasses of diet pop bottles scattered all around. So here are my ideas:

-I have a big sewing project, a quilt I started a while ago and then abandoned when school hit the pre-graduation frenzy, that I’d like to get back to.  It’s the most ambitious one I’ve ever attempted!

-I also have a writing project that is long overdue (to get started on I mean – there is no due date). It is, of course, a zombie novel.  I am not so foolish as to think I can get it published but I do enjoy writing (note the frequency with which I update this blog), and I love zombies, and I love thinkin’ and writin’ about people’s personalities, so it seems like a good way to make use of some of my free time.  If it’s good maybe I will share it, but I am not really sure how my novel writing skills are so we’d better wait and see if it sucks before I commit to that, no?  Anyway is there anything more tedious sounding than someone’s first effort at a zombie novel?  To read, I mean.  I think it sounds like a blast to write.

-And I have of course a lot of reading, including psychotherapy reading, to mow through. I got a recommendation for a basic starter book on logic from Zed, since I have a kindling interest in philosophy, and Husband says I need to read Hume so there’s that too (any Hume experts in the house?  I will probably need your help when I get around to this).

My backlog of books is formiddable – I started tonight with a Russell Hoban novel I haven’t read yet (for anyone who missed it the first ten times I made the recommendation, the best novel I have ever read and you should read it too is Riddley Walker by Russell Hoban.  It is so good I would marry it, or at least read it twice a year.)

-I hope to do a lot of socializing this summer also.  We have a great patio for entertaining and now that it’s getting warmer I hope to make full use of it with guests.  We could use with more comfy seating I suppose, but what can you do?  All our furniture came with Husband’s apartment three buildings back.  This is not really a project so much as a commitment to not become a shut-in as I have a tendency to do sometimes.

But sewing and writing and reading are going to be my main summer projects I think.  First, tomorrow I am going to get the apartment cleaned up.  I cannot think or work in a messy apartment – my brain just shuts off and I get all wubbly-jubbly feeling.  And I’m going to try on a bride’s maid dress with my sister in law, who is getting married in September and, bless her, picked nice dresses for her bride’s maids.  Actually I suppose I am a bride’s matron, since I am married?  In any case we have a lunch date tomorrow.  Lunch, dress, cleaning, and then: SUMMER PROJECTS!

I am really excited to have free time to just do what I like for two solid months!  It’s going to be great!

What are you doing this summer?  Anything special?

Posted in Hobbies, Personal | 7 Comments »

I never did post the pictures of my oatmeal quilt when it was finished.  A recent commenter said she came here looking for inspiration on a neutral coloured quilt, so I thought, I should show how mine ended up!

Here is the quilt as a whole.  I didn’t have a plan for the blocks – I had nine colours in white, beige and yellow and made nineblocks using one of each colour in a random assortment, sewing the main top as I went.  It came out pretty well balanced as a result and it is indeed soothing and oatmealy.  I love it:

Here is a corner showing the binding fabric, which is the same as the backing fabric:

And here is the backing.  My mitering isn’t so good and it’s a little wrinkly but I do love the fabric:

The batting was made of bamboo, which I thought was very cool because it’s renewable and different from the ever-present poly and cotton fills.  The feel of the bamboo batting is wonderfully soft but so light that the weight of the cottons stiffens it up and it’s not a very drapey blanket.  And as it turned out, it is in fact literally cool – this blanket is not warm in the slightest unless you double it up.  My next quilt will have a much warmer batting, probably cotton.

Anywhere, there you have it!  The oatmeal quilt!

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So I went to the cloth shop and got some great fabrics!  I chose a sort of muted, earthy yet still bold pallette.  The pattern called for three colour families, each with seven fabrics, ranging from very light to very dark.  Here is the blue family:

Here is the brown family:

Here is the red family:

Here are the families together:

And here they are again, in a big pile:

The quilt shop women assured me I don’t need to prewash everything, just colours that are likely to run.  How to tell?  Rub ‘em with a wet q-tip and see if any colour transfers.  Then those ones will be washed in whatever temperature you would wash the finished quilt in (cold) to get out excess, and after that I’m ready to cut.

Only I’m afraid to start cutting these beautiful fabrics!  This is the most complex quilt I’ve attempted – lots of different irregular shaped pieces, requiring precision in piecing.  It’s nerve-wracking!  I’ll keep you updated on my progress.

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Sometimes I surprise myself with good meals that come out of cans.  I’m all about using fresh ingredients, but more than that I’m about flavour.  Today I threw together a tex-mex style hash that was darn good.  I reproduce my method here for you to also indulge in the laziness.  Everything is stuff I always have on hand.

Sautee in olive oil:

Half an onion, diced

A fat garlic clove minced fine

A stalk of celery cut into little pieces (optional – I threw it in because I have some celery to get through and I like to add more veggies when I can but don’t sweat it if you don’t have any.)

Add:

Two big cans of diced tomatoes

One can of rinsed kidney or black beans (I prefer black)

One can of refried beans

A generous cup of frozen corn

A tablespoon of pickled jalapenos, minced up, plus a tablespoon or so of the vinegar pickling liquid

Add spices: (your mileage may vary – adjust to taste)

A dash of ground oregano (or a scant teaspoon of flakes)

1/2 teaspoon cumin

1/2 teaspoon ground coriander

1/2 teaspoon chili powder

A few dashes of Tobasco

salt to taste

Optional for vegans:

One tablespoon nutritional yeast – adds that nice cheesy flavour and those essential B’s!

1/3 package of plain veggie crumbles (soy meat or “smeat” as I like to call it) – I did this to use up some crumbles I had leftover and I found it added body and texture, so I recommend it, but you don’t need it.

So you just simmer it all together.  The first three spices are the long cooking variety so you’ll get best results if it can cook for at least a half an hour before eating. If it’s not sharp enough, add more vinegar.  If it’s not spicy enough, add more tobasco or chili.  If it’s too astringent, add sugar, but do it in tiny pinches because nothing ruins a pot of food faster than too much sugar.

If you have it on hand, chopped cilantro would be a nice garnish.  If you eat cheese, crumbled feta would also be a great topper.  Consider also chopped raw green onions, a dollop of hot salsa, diced bell peppers or tomatoes, or crumbled tortilla chips as garnish.  I ate mine plain because I didn’t have any of that stuff in the fridge and it was still awesome.  It’s a bit loose in texture so you could eat it with tortillas as a dipper/scooper, or over rice, but I don’t like to dilute my flavour with plain things so I generally don’t.  But you could.

The thing I like about this is it’s fast to put together, tastes great, and doesn’t require pre-planning or a trip to the grocery store.  It’s made out of staples in my kitchen.  And it’s easy to customize.

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In other news, I am planning a new quilting project.  I am an incredibly slow quilter so I have to make sure I’m not going to get sick of the fabrics and methods before I embark on any new project.  I’ve been planning this one for a long time and think I’m finally ready.  The pattern comes from the book I learned to quilt from: Quiltmaking By Hand, by Jinny Beyer.  I bough this book when I lived in Halifax and didn’t have a sewing machine, and I think it’s great.  Here’s a picture of the pattern I’ll use, which was made entirely by hand by Ms. Beyer:

But I’ll be using a machine.  The colours are quite washed out in this picture, but I used it because it gives a better sense of the look of the quilt.  Here’s the image from Jinny’s webpage, which is more accurate colour-wise:

I’m going to select fabrics today.  I will probably go with different colours but still, isn’t it amazing?  She designed the tesselation herself.  My dream is to one day figure out how to make Escher’s interlocking lizards into a functional quilt pattern but I haven’t got there yet.  Anyway, wish me luck on the fabric purchasing!  And the months and months of effort to come…

Posted in Cooking, Hobbies, Recipe, Veganism | No Comments »

So we’re trying to be more frugal this year.  I’m sort of crafty, so I thought I’d make Christmas tree ornaments to give to family members as presents.  I have been working out how to make little stuffed birds, very simple, made out of fabric I quilted and machine embroidered myself.  The problem is I can’t tell if they’re really good enough for gifts.  I mean, I know everyone will appreciate the work and effort, and family generally enjoy hand made gifts (and my family is middle class enough that we don’t really need to buy each other stuff), but still… are these good, or are they just good thoughts?  I’ve been looking at them all afternoon and I can’t tell anymore.

Please be honest, I don’t want to embarass myself.  Register with a fake name, I have no idea how to trace you.

Side view.

Hanging by the sewn in hanging ribbon.

Aerial view from above:

Head on.  You can see here that I did the belly piece all in reds, to contrast with the greens of the two top panels.  He is asking, “Am I cute, or do I suck?”

Posted in Hobbies | 3 Comments »

So last Christmas I managed to get my finger into my sewing machine and punched a hole straight through my index finder with it.  It hurt like a bastard, scared the bejeesus out of me, and ended with a tetanus shot.  I’ve been hesitant to sew since then, since I seem to have developed an irrational conviction that my sewing machine is merely lying in wait for the next opportunity to sew me.  But today I got back on the horse!  Here is the start of a quilt top I’m putting together.  It’s a very simple pattern in soothing colours, intended for curling up on the couch and reading with:

Here is another view, this time on the Poang ottoman:

So it’s not very far along, but I’m rather pleased with it.  Although it does occur to me that it’s really bland and vanilla colours, which is interested because my apartment is oatmeal coloured, which I often complain about.  I used to blame my landlord for it based on the paint in this place, but maybe I have more to do with it than I’ve acknowledged.  Hmm.

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Today is shaping up to be a great day.  It’s sunny, my house is in great shape (the office is clean!), and as a result I am filled with energy for doing projects and making stuff.  I have a bunch of quilt squares that I think I’ll dig in to today – I’m making a very simple quilt top for a couch blanket.  I’ll watch downloaded TV programs or listen to podcasts and just putter around.  Husband got called in to work, which generally means he’s going to be gone all day, so it’s going to be just me today.

And I was thinking, you know what would be good?  It would be good if I had someone who would just come over and hang out.  Like we used to do in high school, where you didn’t need a plan or a destination or even an activity to visit.  You just came over, and we put on Much Music, and we loafed around drinking Slurpees and talking about boys.  Now that I am an adult, it seems like no one does that any more.  And it’s a shame, because today would be the perfect day for companionable loafing.

We could even talk about boys.

Posted in Domesticity, Existential Angst, Hobbies | 1 Comment »

First game of the official NFL season tonight!  Andy and Esan have committed to overseeing my football education.  I commit to showing up and drinking beer.

The longer I look at it, the weirder the word “beer” looks.  Does that ever happen to you?

Posted in Hobbies | 4 Comments »

Or it that Zombiepocalypse?

In the perfect zombie story, what would happen?  What elements should be present?  What’s the coolest zombie idea ever?

Comment please.

Posted in Hobbies | 1 Comment »

One of the things I struggle with on this blog is my urge to be totally, grossly honest (“So-and-so is such a freaking idiot, can you believe it? Wait till I tell you…”) while maintaining some sort of decency and respectability. What if my anonymity was blown and people at school or work found this? The consequences make my stomach turn. As a result I can’t just be totally honest. I try to write with the idea in mind that one day someone of significance to my life will find this blog, but I have to say I’ve probably already blown my image if that’s the case. Sometimes I fall back on my fantasy belief that my true identity can never be discovered. Well, by anyone other than the friends who already know me. Of course this is nothing more than fantasy. One day, when I get all professional, I may have to deep six the blog to protect my professional identity (did you like how I used “deep six” totally spontaneously? Fucking cool!). In the last week I’ve read about no less then three law suits that were brought or lost due to content on the person in question’s blog (all three were doctors). That’s a scary thought!

So, assuming my ID gets outed one day, I have to self censor. But what if it never happens and I miss the opportunity to go on and on about my fellow students, my work, my screwy family, my true thoughts about things that happen and interactions I have? I guess that’s the price I pay for having an online blog. Alas! Because I totally have some good dirt I could share.

In a perfect world, this blog would function as a no holds barred venting space where I could focus my ire-ful attention on the minutia that makes me crazy. It would be funny. And possibly grounds for dismissal. Why is life so unfair? (Note: said with sarcasm. Only the bourgeios have these kinds of problems. It’s a very white, priviledged problem and I know it.)

The one thing I can probably talk about is me. I was thinking about doing one of those 100 things about me lists, and I may still. But here’s a taste of my top 10:

1. I hate wearing socks and never do if I can get away with it. When I come home, I take off the socks at the same time as the shoes. I cannot understand people who wear shoes inside. Feet need to be free.

2. I don’t understand people who don’t read. What do you people do? (Except Esan: I know he’s out conquering the world one sport at a time, and is excused from reading. I want my blog url on his Tour de France bike.)

3. I have incredibly vivid, cogent, sensual dreams (sensual meaning involving the senses, not necessarily sexual). Movies play out in my dreams. Sometimes I have serial dreams that last over a course of nights with the narrative picking up and progressing each night. I also get night terrors once in a rare while, which sucks harsh donkey cock. I burst out of sleep gasping and terrified, heart slamming and sweating, clutching the bedclothes but struggling to sit up, jam packed with adrenaline. Of course nothing is there. But you try falling asleep after that happens! Good luck! I’ve lucid dreamed twice and it was the best dreaming of my life. In one I controlled my drifting flight over a tennis court and surrounding buildings; in the other I did naughty things I can’t tell you about. Grrrrrawr!

4. I drink about 2L of diet pop a day. Husband never gets any because I drink it all.

5. I’m phonophobic and often go a week or more without answering it. I just let it ring, telling myself if it’s important they’ll leave a voicemail. Then I don’t check voicemail for a week or so. I am somewhat of a phonophobe. I do however obsessively check email, so that’s the way to contact me.

6. I never lose my keys. Ever. Actually, about once a year I lose my keys, and because I have no skills in place to deal with this crisis, my head explodes. Just ask Glass Hurricane, she can tell you.

7. I clean my ears with Q-tips, even though they say you shouldn’t. I derive inordinant pleasure when I get a good waxy clump. Very satistying.

8. I can’t stand to have my navel touched. No one touches my navel, not even Husband, who would like to. Fingers in my navel make me squirm and feel like barfing. I do clean in there (it’s quite deep with a wedge at the bottom, so stuff gets trapped in there) but I have to brace myself and just power through. I consider navel cleaning only slightly less unpleasant than a pelvic exam.

9. I think Oprah is a bossy, self important know it all who clearly does not know it all – and yet feels compelled to tell you all about it. The woman promoted The Secret, which is utter vomit on the scale of purchases (best being kittens and puppies, worst a pail of steaming vomit).

10 I secretly judge everyone. Even you.

Posted in Hobbies, Personal | 9 Comments »